Lynda Mac

Child C missing since 2004 - 2008

In little over 11 days time it will be C’s 12 th birthday. The day after this I should return to court and put in an application for residency .C is well now and he is in remission from leukaemia: prior to this case there were no concerns about me looking after my son. In the ideal world this all sounds reasonable. Stop right there.

There is the little matter of a legal guardian suggesting the use of a draconian order section 91/14 is still running until 2010 and this,is not due to run out till November 2010. I have missed almost 3 years Christmas & Birthdays events in my sons life. Even if I were to turn up at a contact centre it would be sabotaged by a social worker telling him he could not have his presents handed over to him directly they have to go to a social worker.

Right back to the diaries

14th October 2004

Purple Professionals 4:00pm- 5:30 pm

cancelled

Now to take place at the L& D hospital 1;00 pm-2;00 pm

The contact is now to be in the L& D hospital , it was provisionally booked at Purple Professionals in Dunstable in: an over crowded conjoined end of terraced house. This I can tell you, is not a very positive experience for any child to have.We have read some researchers promote this contact :it is supposed to be better for children to have contact . It is presumed that 1 hour a month for a mother & child who have a loving bond with each other ;is adequate to satisfy a child’s needs.

There is very little contact which is given to children whilst they are in the care of Local Authorities , this is when parents are undergoing core assessments by Social Services.Please note these reports are being written up or penned ,by some of the staff who are employed by Social Services : these staff are not all qualified social workers ,neither are they properly trained or need to have any real qualifications to supervise contact.

The bottom line is this; they can stop your contact for no good reason by saying it is not in the child’s BEST interests. they do not even need a court order .My ex-partner was asked to leave the premises of Purple when he was on 1 of these visits . The general public have no idea just how bad this system is and how much damage is done to children: when social services assess the so called risks. Ofsted do not inspect these private CC’s or the staff employed by them.

The recent case of baby P who died after all of the multi-agency groups had access to the family tells: you a little bit about this. You really need to hear it from the children what happens in there, for now maybe I could just describe this as your worst nightmare.

At the moment C is neutrapenic and in an isolation room of his own , the same Magician we saw at Addenbrookes hospital is now on the Rabbit Ward C is delighted he has called in for a few minutes. The amount of pressure we are now under with foster carers and social workers at my sons bedside is awful . I do my best not to let them see how much pressure. I loathe the site of them and I think the feeling is mutual, I catch the nurse looking and the atmosphere is awful. They say children can pick up on this,to be put out of hospital and to find out your child is on their own in a side room with no-one just a nurse to call in for observations sends you cold.

Sometimes social services make matters a hell of a lot worst for families: and they must get a kick out of doing this. I had to read contact sheets saying” C never even asks to see his mother” the legal guardian denied in front of my solicitor saying to me in a telephone conversation ” C is alright he is so happy in foster care with G & N ,it is you that is unhappy being on your own home alone.” I only asked the LG how C was doing?

We had a meeting post final hearing were I was refusing to go to a contact center after an incident with hand over of presents,I never went back unless I had a witness with me. Basically the tried to break me down in this process. I am now the mother who holds the hand of another mother and helps them to cope and walk through this process.

They use this to break the mother in adoption cases ,they want the mother to walk away from the child.In most cases they succeed.

UK2003 ALL Trials

This week people are hearing about the poor toddler baby P who was murdered . Why does there need to be so much secrecy about the social services & the MP’s that are in charge of looking after children?

Why are the politicians afraid to check it out until: that is , it has finally gone so wrong. Professional’s are so devious they wait until the final moment to look to blame someone one else. They are all equally to blame as they do nothing but turn a blind eye long term regarding social services or the so called corporate parent.

Moving on, I have also stopped donating to children’s charities now: e-mails were sent on behalf of children who were being abused in local authority care. Back then the standard reply was, remove me off your e-mail list.

NSPCC is not interested ,neither is the Commissioner for children interested here in the UK .

Back to the diaries 13 th October 2004

9:30 – 10 :30 Luton & Dunstable hospital.

C is now neutrapenic ,this a phase which the patients enter into , when the immune system is more susceptible to picking up infections;which could in some cases be life threatening for someone having treatment for leukaemia.

The social worker rang she offered a time for G C’s brother to have contact 1:00pm-2:00pm . Again imagine any employer letting you have time off on the spot just like this.

Then if you do not go to contact it will not look good for court. The total disruption & financial cost to a family going through this system, is far too much to expect of an ordinary family to deal with this long term for about 2 years.

After 5:00pm not sure these social workers,either work after hours in or out the department of social services office.Or if they will be happy to continue this offer to have contact after most people have finished their work for the day.

I have spoken to a doctor here at the L& D about C’s cultures which will be back later . C has a cough ,and it is no better. He is also on 2 antibiotics,he has also been vomiting, has a temperature,and a red throat .

They are also watching he does not spike a temperature.

Getting back to these social workers are not medically trained to deal with families on wards, or children with leukaemia , however they sit for hours at my sons bedside and write negative reports. Some are not even social workers just a family aid worker.

They are suppose to ring up the hospitals in advance to talk to the medical team about procedures. Most days though I am ahead of the social worker, having rang up and found out the necessary information, you have to learn fast in these circumstances be able to learn also take on board a lot about your child’s needs when they are battling with leuakemia.

Moving on now

God forbid you have to find out how this training is applied or you are identified as a msbp mother in the process. The lead has already been given also a questionaire sent out to the school by the expert witness.

I mention C is coughing this will become an issue. (They say we have not got asthma. )

At the beginning of a case ,if there are no mental health issues or prior evidence of neglect etc concerning the child ,then watch out for the emotional harm allegation they use this if they can not get you on anything else.

The guidelines set out are : these children are normally well dressed & well looked after children who come from good homes, this is the criteria Danya Glaser & Dr Claire Sturge et al have highlighted in text books.

I have since read in the paperwork , a headmistress says:” the mother is well dressed so is the child “.So these must be the operative words left to hang you out to dry.

Since when has it been a crime to take pride in clothing your children?

This Dr Sturge wrote in her report ; she had a number of shopping bags with her . I turned up in a taxi at her Gayton Road Family Clinic Harrow, earlier on in September to meet her . I arrived early in Harrow in plenty of time to find the clinic. I went and had a coffee in the shopping mall, I had some spare time to walk around the shopping centre. There I bought some clothes from H&M for my son. This was also to be another fatal mistake . Whatever you do not turn up with shopping bags, that is if , you are going, for a psych report.

The school information which was collected over a time about our family and collated through the multi-agency group, was another aspect I had difficulty with . I found this information was also incorrect and not based upon any real events that took place. A social worker wrote , they asked her to pick up her son from school in April 2004 , the child complained of back ache. I was then later accused the note taking of a SW after talking to someone at the school f not taking my son to see a doctor before taking him abroad. None of this stuff is removed just left on file.

Even though this evidence was checked out the doctors pulled off computer print outs that I did take him there, I found plenty of evidence they would have spent a very long time exhausting some thing and nothing in this process .

Then I find a quote by Dr Sturge , in a fax to child’s solicitor which was of interest saying: the head’s evidence was insufficient ,however the head made it to the final hearing to give her evidence against me in closed court.

I want to know how under data of protection ,how these comments, also many other comments , can then be used in evidence in closed court. Then again this is only a kangeroo court. I read a blog yesterday how much paper work is created for an adoption case. What is the true account of the destruction on the rain forest this paperwork is taking on ….

I thought the gentleman has not got a clue how much paperwork is involved to destroy an innocent family in court probably to be able to allow adopters to be in with a chance.

It is clearly time the MP’s listened more to ex-service users about what is wrong with the system that is clearly out of control.

Somebody needs to be held accountable for baby P . Then again there is no pleasure to be gained in destroying the parents who are guilty of real abuse in real cases . The thrills of persecuting innocent parents in closed court is so much more rewarding to these professionals as it is a lengthy process and 1 that pays a lot of taxpayers money.

outside for a few minutes

Help With Paper Work

I posted a video on You Tube yesterday it was placed 57 viewed , it is the start of practical help with dealing with the paperwork . It is a mammoth task and not 1 many families can deal with at the time a case is live.

There has recently been an increase of 70% of people LIP it is no surprise that most families are now onto the fact that the solicitors do not fight your case and are going it alone.

If the link does not work type in Liverpoollou6 Help with Paperwork .

Hindsight is a wonderful thing back then I would be no worse thought of for not turning up for meetings and cracking up under the enormous strain. I would not certainly be in the amount of debt I got in ,also my reputation as a parent would be as it was. No prior history of neglect or of emotionally harming my child . Some say call social services bluff,why not they mostly use bluff. If they are going to take your children away say “take them then.” This a guarantee you will have them returned if you show you are not interested.

I have to admit now if you take part in these core assessments,then you also have take full responsibility for the outcome, do not say you were not warned. There is so much information on the internet now giving guidance to unsuspecting ,trusting parents . It is important to know this when working with the multi-agencies, they are getting paid a lot of money to find you guilty. It is not going to stop with a sorry we will let you go now,give you back your children , we made a mistake. There will be no professional to stand up for you, or come to your aid with a reference, or medical evidence to prove you innocent.

This is closed court and it is a free for all , they can do what they want write as many statements and no-one is allowed in. The recent BBC Panorama slightly touched on the problem of data of protection and secret files they are keeping on families .

I tried to hard to work with good faith having believed in the system back then ,now I admit I would not grass my worse enemy up to social services.I have also spent far too much money, and tax-payers to the tune of

not dressed after swimming lessons in Cyprus

Special moments treasured memories of my child C.

Wednesday 6th October 2004

10:00am L& D hospital C is due his Cytarabine as part of his treatment for leukaemia,they call this cared share with Addenbrookes as the lead hospital and the L& D local hospital sharing the rest of the care .

Thursday 7th October 2004 10:00 am L & D

4:30 pm – 5:30 pm Supervised contact

Friday 8th 2004 10:00 am L & D

Phone calls 1st call was from social worker informing me C was poorly. To have to deal with 2nd hand information is your worst nightmare especially if it is not correct information. I was given a number of apologies for being distressed in 2005 over an error with administering medication after he was fast tracked to his current carers.

The social services did not do adequate parent assessments prior to fast tracking C to his father .

The bloated 1 the family aid worker has turned up now within an hour of the last telephone call.She is with the social worker :they now hand over a travel warrant there is money in an envelope for all the money I have spent on travelling 3 times a week and more besides on running to core assessments in Luton court in London was paid through legal aid by my solicitor.

They paid some travel expense not all of it. I do not know how families manage to do this it is too much for 2 people working to contend with let alone living on benefits and having to stay over in Cambridge because you are exhausted with the commuting during the week and court in London.

9th Saturday 10:00am this is the first appointment I have not been able to attend .The Social Worker informed me that I was not allowed to as it was Saturday. I could have 4 hours contact in a contact centre on a Saturday ,not just this Saturday in the L& D whilst C was having a blood transfusion.

This is just brutal to be denied seeing you child when they need you so much. This foster carer is probably stopped my coming in to see C . I find out later it is her responsibility to let me know when there are appointments for hospital. The judge said to let me in give me medical training ,so that I will be able to look after C .

I rang up Interflora , I felt really uncomfortable back then as I tried to explain to the man on the phone why, I as a mother can not get in to see my son. The man was lovely on the phone he asked me “what does he like”, he was only 7 years old at the time , he used to love cuddly toys .

Every time I used to look at him he had a figure or a small bear in his hand. When we travelled abroad he would be playing with a Stuart little figure , it would be put through it’s paces in the swimming pool in the Land of the Kings in Cyprus Until Stuart finally he perished with so much use, we had to get another 1 for him. I found Stuart stripped bare in a box sometime ago and I felt compelled to rescued him as he was a special memento of much happier times. If I go up in the loft there are hundreds of toys there, collectors items amongst the junk, if you are lucky maybe even some first editions to be found.

I send in a get well balloon & a toy bear C used to love cuddly toys and bears Mum sends her love via Interflora and pushes past the foster carer just for this weekend it seems.

Sunday 10th October C was admitted to Rabbit Ward the same ward we were originally sent to after we landed at Luton Airport trying to get home ,this is 5 minutes drive to our house and we never got home in 2004 .

I was not told he was admitted to hospital by social services or the foster carers, so if your child ends up being injured in foster care then you can expect not to find out if they are being adimtted to hospital what ever the reasons.

Even on Christmas day my son spent his first Christmas alone without so much as a phone call to his next of kin /family.

This is what you call being a looked after child , then this has to be cruelty beyond belief.

The River man reminds me of Nick Drake song

Addenbrookes 3 times a week

Yet another night in on bonfire night, this is the 4th year now we have not managed to celebrate Bonfire night as we have been parted as a family long term. Ordinarily we would go to see all the fireworks displays together. My son is coming up to 12 years old in December and he has been in remission from T cell ALL since the start of treatment in April 2004 now.

I suppose this is a good enough reason to celebrate him just being alive and well if not anything else we have to be grateful for,even though the courts & my ex-partner can not be reasonable or manage the contact with my son now or in the future just so long as he is alive that is enough to carry us through until we meet up hopefully 1 day in the future.

I have been talking on sykpe today and sent a link to TalkShoe .com SpliTnTwo.com it was interesting to know how others are networking and reaching out to other parents in this growing trend of children being alienated from another parent. http://www.talkshoe.com/blog/index.php/category/events

PAS is what it is called the UK Courts are systematically taking children from good mothers and placing with abusive men.

Get over it !

We have to ever day we wake up and meet the silence in our homes , this is compounded with the gagging orders we have been given and penal warnings from courts not to go anywhere near schools or ex-partners homes.

We have no convictions for any REAL child abuse they, the courts just need to protect with a crystal ball, if they can not get you on anything like neglect then you MUST be an emotional harmer .

The feminist Psychiatrists are having a wail of a time in closed court, wait until you get trapped by some jobs worth working for the NHS, next time you dare step out of line and complain about the standard of care given to your child in hospital.

I heard a writer say today, keep a journal , a diary he said it is part of the 5 steps to grieving or getting over a loss or a death. He missed out this is a living bereavement.

This is what most mothers call it , then he was not a mother he was a father caught up in all of this.

I never thought I would ever be able to post in a blog about our experience let alone find the BBC reading a mother struggling to come to terms with computer literacy and just the basics of english to scrape through for a blog.

I imagine when I finally finish my book “When Will I Be Coming Home? ” this will just have to be handed over to a proof reader

Recently I asked my MP Kelvin Hopkins to ask Jack Straw just how many people have this rarely used draconian order? This is the reply I got: I am getting so used now to being insulted by MP’s and Craft Crap otherwise known as Caffcass UK Secret Courts done a very good interactive video on You Tube after Children were used ……….

I stayed here over night to exhausted to travel anymore

29th Wednesday September 2004 diaries of yet another an unfit mother going through core assessments for social services .

10:45am arrive at the L& D for Cytarabine my son is having 3 years treatment for leukaemia.

G the Foster carer said he was tearful said he is still”fed up with hospitals”

14 days to go of thoirguane

1 day of chemotherapy

We depart at 12:30 pm C is still fed up and very moody. I hardly know my own child now: as he is in foster care since 7th July 2004 with a same sex couple and this next remark I am not prepared for.

I am wondering if it is to do with the school playground stuff he has been told by older children,children can be so cruel,maybe his peers have got wind of these women are lesbians. Let’s face it the school gate is buzzing with talk now at home time someone else is picking up C and not his mother who usually picks him up.

consultant does not think mother can look after her own son

For a 7 year old, he has described something like this: children should not be asking these questions, about the intimacy between two women and how they interact together in the privacy of their own home. I make him apologize now to her for saying this: ill or not he is not allowed to get away with the last remark.

As ill as C is he has said a lot of things which were just so off the wall.It seems he is still doing this now only with the foster carers. C has lost his appetite due to the treatment.

30th September 2004

10:00 am L& D hospital we have to go back again for the drug Cytarabine to be given to C

Thursday 4:00 5:30 pm supervised contact Purple Professionals

1st October 2004 time is flying past us now

10:00 am Cytarabine I have rang the L & D I asked about C’s white count it is 3.7 today I rang the Family aid worker S , I asked her to clarify whether or not we could go out or not.

Instead of being helpful, or trying to offer support or even give advice she came out with:” remarks about a crystal ball gazing “.I have not got a crystal ball!”

I asked her boss the Social worker if she knew when the white count would be at a decent level to be able to go out in the community on contact.She was vague did not know , did not have time to communicate with Addenbrookes hospital under the multi-agency gathering.

I later rang father J here in our local church to arrange meetings for C to attned when he was well for to make his holy communion.

2nd Saturday October 2004

10:00am I arrived at the hospital I waited 45 minutes for the foster carer to turn up . The judge said to let me attend all appointments and to be trained by staff to be able to look after my son.

The excuse was C had a lay in ,she did not think to ring me up and let me know so she left me sitting in the hospital 45 minutes.

The supervised contact is also changed around now instead of 12:30 – 4:30 pm it is now 2:00pm – 6:00 pm .Poor C has a sore mouth and is having problems eating. I arrive at Purple Contact Centre 15 minutes early, I have bought some veg and prepare to make some soup.I find out they have no blender in the house so on top of all the other expenses.

The Foster Carer is late again,this time today stuck in traffic , we finally manage to get out with some dopey looking social worker whose car stinks and is full of dog hairs. We sit in her car heading over to Luton. I take C in to buy him games for his play station and a leather hat to wear to hide his hair loss.